Where would we all be without the encouragement, support, and friendly advice of our fathers?

Whether it’s positive words of wisdom or a verbal kick in the you-know-what, dads have a unique way of sharing their knowledge and experience with us. Sometimes the delivery and tone can be suspect, but dads are rarely afraid to pass along wisdom about things they really care about—like cars. Further proof is our 2nd Annual Dad’s Advice Awards (see last year’s awards here).

Not sure about a potential project vehicle? Stonewalled by a stuck nut or bolt? Forced to choose between your girlfriend or your latest project? Dad has been there, done that—and this year’s award-winners prove it:

Best Practical Advice Award

“Don’t throw parts at a problem. Properly diagnose the problem first—it will save you a lot of money and headache.” —Kyle S.

“Always mark the spark plug wires as to where they go.” —Todd B.

“Try to fix the easiest thing first and then look deeper.” —Colby G.

Best Non-Practical Advice Award

If your car lasts you over 250,000 miles, you haven’t had any fun with it.” —Derek D.

Man of Few Words Award

“He just threw a breaker bar at me!” —Jody F.

The Secret to Life Award

“It’s easier with beer!” —Donald O.

The Cranky Mom Award

“When washing a crankshaft in the bathtub, make sure your wife is away for a few urs.” —Steve W.

The “Out of Left Field” Award

“Women are expensive!!” —Mike B.

The Master Mechanic Award (3-Way Tie)

“S—, I rounded it. Go get me a hammer and the next size smaller.” —Jerritt T.

“Everything fits with a big enough hammer.” —Dave K.

“Change the blinker fluid.” —Shane C.

The Eluding & Evading Award

“Drive it like you stole it! Unless you stole it…then obey the law.” —Bigg R.

“You may be able to outrun the (police) car, but you can’t outrun a radio.” —Mitchell N.


The Sad But True Award

“Always buy a stick shift! It’s a great theft deterrent and most people won’t be able to borrow your car!!” —Eric E.

The 2-for-1 Award

“Keep the big one between the ditches and the little one in your britches.” —Jeff O.


The Tough Love Award

“Walk, ride the school bus, or learn to fix it.” —Brian B.

The EPA Award

“Build something 25 years or older—no emissions testing.” —Jared M.

The Scare Tactic Award

“It takes a lot of nuts and bolts to build a car, but only one nut to screw it up.” —Bobby D.

 The Honesty Award

“Have your mom teach you to drive…I don’t have the patience.” —Jason C.

 The Feuding Fathers Award (50-Way Tie)

“Don’t drive a Chevy.” —Chawn Q.

“Buy a Chevy.” —Jerry F.

“Don’t buy a Ford!” —Tom S.

“Go fast and always buy a Ford.” —Gavin M.

“Not to ever buy a Chrysler product.” —Charles W.

“Buy Mopar!!!” —Chester L.

Share this Article
Author: David Fuller

David Fuller is OnAllCylinders' managing editor. During his 20-year career in the auto industry, he has covered a variety of races, shows, and industry events and has authored articles for multiple magazines. He has also partnered with mainstream and trade publications on a wide range of editorial projects. In 2012, he helped establish OnAllCylinders, where he enjoys covering all facets of hot rodding and racing.